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"Role-Playing Master (for Gygax)" by HAIRWOLF

from the album Roughly Produced Masterpieces

Dr. Hercules: guitar, lyrics, vocals
Kai Demasonai: drums & backing vocals
#2: bass
John LaSala: the DM's voice
Jeff LaSala: the DM's words

"Dedicated to the memory of the original role-playing master, Gary Gygax" —John LaSala & HAIRWOLF

Have a listen: Listen

Welcome to the labyrinth of the world.
It's a land of three letters: AD&D.
Filling out your character sheet,
You're keeping track of HPs & XPs.

Well he's the Role-Playing Master,
The Polyhedron Caster.
He's gonna kill you with his die.
He's the Role-Playing Master,
The Magic Missile Blaster.
His Armor Class is minus nine.

Bag of Holding, my flint and steel,
Iron rations and a bastard sword.
Forget Comeliness—this is all about Strength!
No more Charisma, but maybe your Dexterity can save you now…

From the Role-Playing Master,
The Polyhedron Caster.
He's gonna kill you with his die.
He's the Role-Playing Master,
The Magic Missile Blaster.
His Armor Class is minus nine.

The DM:
Evil creeps across the realm.
The death knight's power is in his helm,
And monsters swarm from planes beyond.
You'd better save verses rod, staff, or wand!
And whosoever shall be caught
Without a shield by clerics wrought
Must stand and fight the hounds of hell
Or wander deep in dungeons fell.

Now roll!

Now he's the Roll-Playing Master,
The Polyhedron Caster.
He's gonna kill you with his die.
He's the Roll-Playing Master,
The Magic Missile Blaster.
His Armor Class is minus nine.

He's the Roll-Playing Master,
The Polyhedron Caster,
He's gonna kill you with his die.
He's the Roll-Playing Master,
The Magic Missile Blaster.
His Armor Class is minus nine.

(Goodbye, Gary)

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